I've been asked nearly a million times, what is a woolymuffin... That question doesn't interest me as much as, should it be a woolymuffin or a woollymuffin?

According to most dictionaries and even Google, wooly and woolly are the same word. Most people using the word, tend to spell it woolly, especially when walking about woolly mammoths, caterpillars, hats, sheep, monkeys, woodchucks, bears, spiders and butts (don't worry, its a tree, just don't ask me about the Woolly Butt Bungalow). It seems as if the people who use the word "wooly" are just too lazy to put that extra, pointless "l" in the middle of the word.

Well, no more. Lazy writers look no further than the made up word "woolymuffin"! It is only correct to spell it with one and only one "L" by decree of the Official Convoluted Woolymuffins Linguistics Department. Spelling it "woollymuffin" will get you an Official Convoluted Grammar Citation which has the entirely optional penalty of having to buy the OCW Linguisitcs Department a pizza. Now, if you're like me and you're thinking... gee, "woolymuffin" has a extraneous "F" in it, as long as we're redefining language anyway, shouldn't-- NO, fuck off, does "mufin" look like something you'd say? Outloud in public? Besides, I registered this domain for like a billion years, and I've already had to make some bizarre justification for spelling "woolly" wrong.... its fine the way it is. Just ask my City of Heroes character Face Pucher Jr. about irrevocable, albeit hilarious misspellings.

The End.